So last night i went to a friends graduation, and met up with a bunch of people that i really missed, my school peeps.
And we talked and laughed and i told them about my recent heartbreak.
And one of my friends told me i shoul´ve made the guy break up his relationship for me.
I told him i couldnt do that and stuff, cause it wouldnt feel right.
After a lot of beers i got my blackberry and started to read my old emails, that he sent me, and god, all i wanted to do is call him, thankfully i didnt have his number, but i almost sent him an email.
I get so mad with myself when i think about this stuff, cause i consider myself a strong person, self control and all, but last night i almost lost it alittle.
I promised myself a long time ago that i would never be this person that syas, choose me, love me, pick me! i think that´s horrible you know, to have to beg for someones affection, but at the same time i really want to be with him, i miss him, i miss that son of a bitch.
Wich is RIDICULOUS, cause we´ve met twice in life, and ok we talked for hours, the first time like 4 hours, the second like 8 hours, but even though it seems a long time it´s not , i think, but still i miss him, i never had this connection with anyone you know, that connection that you can talk talk talk talk, and there´s never that unconfortable silence or you run out of things to say.
All i know is that i need to get out of this funk, fast, it´s not healthy, really….